A 'Faux' Tale. (Soft 'vore)

(All righty, still a touch on the rusty side here...so I'll go with something nice and short until my rhythm's back.)


As one enters the dusty confines of a certain vulpine's home they see that the owner certainly has a large number of books stacked here and there, with only a rather musty pair of cushions situated by an antique typewriter. And seated right in front of the curious device, deftly using his claws to press the buttons (He doesn't have fingers, afterall), is what appears to be a male ninetales wearing-of all things- a pair of pinch'nez glasses. "Hmm?" One of his ears twitches back at some sound. "Oh, welcome, wel-come," He says in a somewhat jovial tone and with that vulpine smile that seems to certainly show far too many teeth for one's comfort. "Wanting a tall tale, hmm? I might have something here for you...." His tails ruffle a little as he looks around briefly, before pulling a piece of crumbling paper out from somewhere. "Here, I hope you don't expect me to read it myself; I've got too much work to do for that." He snickers as he sets it down. "And have a cushion-they're still rather comfortable...And don't mind the damage, I'll fix that paper eventually..." Perhaps with one last wary look at the oversized, slightly smug-looking fox one takes the sheet.

*********

"Oh, don't worry...this won't hurt a bit..." The 'canine chuckled gruffly as he kept the rodent pinned with an enormous forepaw-well, to the 'tatta it was enormous. "Well, at least I don't think it'll hurt...I wouldn't know." The ratatta wriggled, rounded ears flicked back and squeaking quite incomprehensibly in between pleas for mercy and that it knew far better prey for something as noble as an arcanine.

Not that Dai'shur cared, really, what his prey thought...and 'noble' his fluffy orange rump.

Even if it did know something better, he'd eat the rodent anyway; it was a matter of ethics. If he wanted to waste the extra energy following a potentially false lead, it was only fair he indulge in a bit extra. Sound logic, perhaps.

So, instead he firmly pressed his paw down on the rodent's back-more to make it panic even more as he considered if he wanted to waste some time. ~Eh, what the heck.~ His arched, horse-ish tail flicked back and forth lazily as he applied a bit more pressure. "Stop moving, idiot." The ratatta's ears flicked back further, if that was possible...but it did stop trying to get away. And it shut up too; that was a plus. "Tell you what, snack, I'm feeling charitable." He dipped his head forward until his muzzle was a mere inch or two away from the rodent's head-so that when he talked that slightly sulfurous breath (If one didn't want to include the usual reek a predator's breath could have, anyway) would make the ratatta gag.

"I'll take you up on that offer of something better...but I gotta know a couple of things." He huffed. "What's so much better than a soft little morsel like you, and are you willing to show me where it is?"

The rodent's silence was painful...well, for them, at least, as he kept the pressure up-still not enough to do any long-term damage, of course. And it'd figure, just as he was starting to get bored enough to roast the over-fuzzed rat she'd start talking in that rather squeakish voice some had. "F-fine!" She said with a wriggle that spoke of her trying to get some leverage again, "It-it's a..." "Yes...?" Dai'shur's tail arched slightly as he peered intently at said rodent whilst she built up the nerve to continue. "It's a rabbit-fox!" the rattata blurted suddenly. The arcanine raised an invisible eyebrow; near as he knew there was only one fox-like species out there that could be described as such. "You mean a Jolteon." "Y-y-yes!" The rodent cringed as he snorted, before, as far as he was concerned, having the gall to continue. "So...u-um...are you going to let me go so I can show you?" She sounded both desperately deceptive and hopeful, and he liked it.

"Perhaps." He said, and the 'canine was relatively certain she could feel him smiling toothily. "But I don't think I'll let you off that easy. You did bite me earlier, afterall, before I even noticed you were there. I thought you rodents had a lot more sense than that." The rodent's ears flicked back further, if that was possible; Indeed, this whole episode could have been avoided if she hadn't tried that little stunt in a bid to make him leave the area. "So, I think I know a better way for you to show me," he continued as he brought his head down a bit lower-so that his nose nearly touched the back of her head, "I'll carry you. If you don't move, I won't bite down...nor will I do it if I feel what you lead me to is worth my time. Got it?" The last part wasn't really a question, to be honest, and she knew it.

"All right..." She shivered a little as the tiger/wolf rumbled thickly with slight impatience.

That was all he needed to hear, really. Faster than the eye could follow, so it seemed, the arcanine lifted his paw up and quickly darted his head forward to firmly clamp his jaws down on the rattata's back before she could attempt anything. Granted, now he couldn't talk-unless one understood canine body language- but still. His prey knew what he was expecting. "Last I saw," She squeaked in a somewhat resigned tone as she wisely took on that limp 'dead' aspect, "The...um...fox-er...I mean...Jolteon was to your right." There was a brief pause before she added helpfully-perhaps hoping that it'd go in her favor- "I don't know if they're still there, though, but they didn't look too good...they were grumbling about an upset stomach and chewing grass." ~Great, I'm being led to a lunch with heartburn,~ Dai'shur thought sardonically as he started padding off in the suggested direction.

It was perhaps after half an hour that the arcanine was starting to think that the rodent had been lying to him a little.

True, he'd caught a whiff of that somewhat vulpine musk the 'eon species had-and evidence of slightly cropped greenery- but following the trail hadn't led to anything yet. And Dai'shur wasn't always that willing to take his time. Afterall, if he'd had an upset stomach, he wouldn't be running too far or anything. And the canine was relatively sure that it applied to other species as well. Maybe not all, but some. ~Besides, if I recall those 'half-rabbits' are awfully stringy...and certainly a bit too lean for my tastes...eh, whatever. I got something here, and I'm not going to go after something that requires more energy and pain tolerance than it's worth to catch...be it sick to its gullet or not.~

It was a simple enough matter to do what he'd planned on, really. First, bite down with crushing force so that the rodent squealed as her back broke with a squelchy- and rather satisfying- crunch...then, perhaps with a bit of flair, tossing the now-incapacitated rattata up into the air with a flick of his head to be briefly char-broiled by a gout of flame before the height of her ascension. ~Well, that silenced the squeal,~ he thought as he deftly caught the somewhat charred rodent in his jaws. Needless to say, it was rather common practice to swallow such small prey whole.

"Fei, mostly fur like I'd thought," He grunted, licking his jaws a few seconds later. "Not bad, though...maybe I'll look for something else in a bit..."

******

Alas, it seems the paper is far too deteriorated to be able to read further, so one sets it aside-seeing the vulpine having gone back to whatever project he was working on. Hmm, maybe another story could be coaxed out of him at some point...

(And so we go on, right...? Keep in mind that, in this bit, even if they show human-ish qualities they are still normal pokemon in every meaning of the word -just able to talk/walk, and do only a few of the things people can do if they feel so inclined. I gladly welcome questions via PM, if you want to understand better for this piece.)

Of course, one decides to pester him in the hopes of getting something far better. Or at least a little. "What, you're still here?" The cream-tinted vulpine huffs a bit grumpily as he pans his head just enough to look behind him before looking away with an exasperated air. One could swear he was muttering something about having hoped to bore one into leaving, but before it could be confirmed, he turns around with a smile - a rather forced smile, it appears. "I guess you're after something more than that, hmm? I should have known I suppose." He sighs, an ear twitching back. "Fine. I'll give you something to stick your nose into; a nice bit of fantasy...just so long as I can finish what I'm doing...Got to finish this recipe book someday, you know..." That last part was muttered under his rodent-scented breath as he fished out a few more sheets of paper.

************

"I dunno, aren't you supposed to do that before you cook it?" Brei asked gruffly-her twin-tipped tail quivering slightly as she glanced at their catch -a lopunny they'd managed to catch...and whom was currently gagged with a wad of grass and being used as a seat by the espeon, "You know, at least choke it or something?" "Who said I want to cook it?" Kaven huffed, that puff of a tail fluffed to its fullest as he used it much like a cushion for himself. "I'd rather save my breath, if you get my meaning." The flareon snickered as his companion sighed. "Besides, the last time you wanted me to 'cook' something I did it wrong and you complained it was a bit too crunchy for it's own good." He paused, that short muzzle wrinkling a little. "Or did you say too charred? I forget."

"Right." Brei sounded a touch sarcastic as she patted one of the rabbit-type's muscular hips-right now said bunny was pretty much still out for the count. Confusion followed by a tackle tended to do that. "Doesn't answer my question, fuzz-butt." Like she was one to say that! "We going to kill it now, or are you going to be as bad as my cousin Tain was?" She shook her head. "She never should have fell in with those poochyena though-they had her over a slow fire just because she bet they wouldn't do it." She smiled a little then, catlike ears perked at the memory. "At least she didn't smell too bad."

The flareon smirked. "Yeah, that was true. But..." He glanced at the now-twitching lopunny thoughtfully. "I guess we'll end it now. Want to use a rock, or do it the old-fashioned way?" "Whatever suits you is fine." Wait. Wouldn't using a rock count as the same thing? Whatever. His friend's tail quivered a bit more as she eyed him for a moment. "Well, get over here then. I'm certainly not doing it," She sniffed. "What, just because you're treating lunch like bedding material I have to do it?" He grumbled as he got up and padded over. "Whatever. I'm so going to set you on fire someday." She sniggered, shifting position a little so that the 'rabbit' groaned. "As if. You know you wouldn't do that to a pretty female like-" She paused, an ear twitching back as there was that faint popping sound one would associate with a broken neck- "me. You might wanna do that with someone else, though..."

Brei smiled a bit innocently as she got up and stretched-now that she could, anyway. "Well, wait. They breathe fire too...It wouldn't be so easy. Hmm...And couldn't you wait to start eating?" She huffed at the squitchity sound one would link with that. "What?" Kaven said a bit guiltily-his voice slightly muffled. "I haven't had anything since yesterday morning!" He swallowed before speaking again. "Besides, if there's anyone I'd want to see burnt it's that furret that's been sticking his nose into our territory. Or maybe snatched by a pidgeot; either one would do it." He licked his muzzle a bit before going back to eating. "Or you could make him spazz out for a bit and see if he gets himself offed." Brei shook her head as she decided to join in the dining. "Fun as that sounds, I don't think that'd end well if nothing happened. And you better have left that liver for me this time," She huffed as she nudged him in the stomach in a teasing fashion, "Or someone's waking up neuter tomorrow."

The flareon swallowed again-though not quite for the same reason as earlier-, looking a bit more guilty. "Um, about that..."


(To be continued, perhaps...Writing at 5am is a killer, I tell yah! As before, questions, comments are welcome.)